


And After All Are One?

by NonbinaryHylian (chicagoartnerd)



Series: Without Love There Is No Meaning [3]
Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Character Study, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fix-It, Horny Senator Shockwave is cannon, M/M, Post-Canon, Sounding, Sticky Sexual Interfacing, i don't make the rules
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-10-01 19:48:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20384977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chicagoartnerd/pseuds/NonbinaryHylian
Summary: If quantum clones of Shockwave and Optimus Prime kiss in the post Lost Light #25 alternate universe, does that mean they finally get their happily everafter?





	And After All Are One?

Orion, no Optimus, pulled him into his arms one last time before he stepped back and shot him through the singularity generator in his chest. It had been the first time he had held him in 4 million years and he was finally himself enough to appreciate it. Too bad it was over so quickly, if it had lasted he would have turned his head to the left slightly and kissed...ahhhh. 

No. 

He hadn’t had lips for longer than the paltry time period humanity had walked the Earth. 

It was like watching a particularly graphic holo-vid, everything that he had done, everything that was done to him, over the last couple millenia. He was still reeling from regaining his emotions, which was odd seeing as how he should be dead. Shockwave had asked Optimus and Megatron to shoot him through the spark thus collapsing the generator and making the pinpoint singularity consume itself instead of the known universe. Theoretically. 

It seemed like his creation wasn’t behaving within its predicted parameters. Which was interesting and also terrifying. New and novel to be so afraid of something he had wrought. Oh, but there were a lot of plans he had set in motion and executed that were horrifying. Jhiaxus had been proud, then disappointed, and then proud again, oh and then dead. He’d seen so much. But that was just it, he hadn’t lived any of it. None. 

The part of himself that could feel had been locked away screaming silently into the dark well they had dropped him down 4 million years ago. Endless nothingness, he’d eventually dropped into forced stasis to stave off insanity. Judging by what he had done without his emotional core processing and his personality, he very well might have gone insane regardless. He could see the...logic of what he had done far too easily, follow his own threads and treads of thought to their ultimate conclusions. 

He shivered at that, his plating flaring and shaking. He had awoken in agony to realize he had become a monster willingly and with cold calculated precision. Orion, no no no, not his Orion. 

Optimus had been the one to reach down and pull him up from the depths, dragging him through the heavy layers of water, to shake him awake into the gasping light. 

Their bench. 

That broken down piece of scrap held together with hopes and grit. He had brushed their hands together casually the first time they had sat side by side on that bench. Shockwave could have passed it off as an accident if Orion hadn’t grabbed his hand hastily in his own. He snatched it up like he thought it would fly away from him, frightened. That had been the start of it. 

They had shared their first kiss on that decrepit bench as well. It made his spark thrum and pound in chest with longing. He’d missed him so much. Missed feeling like this, feeling anything so terrible as longing, so much. Orion’s shaking in-vent as he bent down and kissed him quickly, optics more blue and beautiful than the Matrix itself. So soft for someone so strong. He had melted against his windshield and kissed him back, fiercer and more possessive. Like his life depended on it. Maybe it had, slag.

He had also contemplated throwing a leg over his hip and crawling into his lap to ride him on that bench, but they had never been quite that bold. Public sex was something Orion, as an officer of law, was opposed to in practice, though he appreciated it in theory. He had thoroughly fragged Shockwave against the bay windows of his high rise apartment more than once. Oh...the feel of him inside him, chest to chest, his face buried hot and panting in his neck. Sizzling beads of electricity crackling up their thighs to ground themselves in the heat where they were joined. He was getting wet just thinking about it. Primus. 

Shockwave hadn’t interfaced in millions of years. He laughed out loud at that. 

Of course that would be what he was fixating on. It was easier than everything else, the indignation of not getting off for ages made him smile. Or made him feel like smiling, he still lacked a mouth. Thinking about missing out on any sort of sex life reminded him too much of what, or should he say who, he now lacked. Damn him. 

Why was he still alive? Now that he understood and felt what he had lost, all the wonderful things that were being denied him, he was not dead. Again. In a new and very dimensionally divisive way. Perhaps he was dead in his original universe and was now a quantum clone in this new space. A perfect double with all the same memories as his other self, a copy. It was theoretical at best, and outright imaginative at worst. Although if he was still alive, though not in his universe anymore, it probably meant Optimus was also still alive, as the universe he had vacated probably still existed. Maybe he was with Megatron. He hoped not actually  _ with _ Megatron. Ugh another thing for him to brood over it seemed. He was starting to recall Megatron’s...obsession would be putting it too kindly, with Optimus.

Not that it mattered. He couldn’t act on this newfound jealousy as he was currently falling up through the space in between worlds. He wasn’t dead, which was something of a complication as one was supposed to be in order to pass through these types of planes. Right? He knew the theoretical physics of alternate universes, the Dark Universe being an exemplary point of reference. But as to where precisely he was, he had no clue. 

The singularity had collapsed as intended, taking him with it as he intended, except he didn’t die, as predicted. And he might be quantum duplicate. But. Oh. Optimus’s face when he shot him. In all of those ugly and abhorrent memories he had of the last couple millenia he could not recall him ever looking at him so brokenly. That didn’t bear thinking about though. 

Shockwave tucked the last flickers of Optimus’s face deep down in his processor, in the dark recesses he’d once been imprisoned in. He was still alive, there was time to grieve and to process his grief, later. There would be a later, most likely.

His ores appeared to be having a reality and time warping effect. That much was easily deduced, he was also in a vacuum. That had some more intriguing implications. He wondered where and for how long he would be falling, or flying as the case may be? Almost as if the space was answering him a hole opened up in front of him like a great round window. A sea of red sand rose up through it and the hot winds pushing it in waves whipped at his chest and head. Gravity also returned in a very meaningful way. 

Shockwave hit the sand face first before he could brace for impact and skidded for several meters through it before coming to a skidding stop facedown on a hill. He ex-vented in a sigh, at least he could do that still. No head based intake anymore but plenty of chest vents. Getting his hands under him he looked up just in time to see the flat black disk of the portal that dropped him there wink out of existence. Well, that was that. Whenever or wherever he was he was going to be stuck here for a while. 

Which wasn’t looking promising, as the surrounding area was just a landscape of shifting red sand, the sky a burning blue green. His chem censors told him there was a mostly oxygen based atmosphere on the planet. It wasn’t Earth though. He chronometer had no idea what the date or time was and all of his spatial and planetary sensor readouts were coming back as overly polite error messages. His systems were trying very apologetically to let him know that they had no idea where or when he was. In fact, if certain messages from his ore signature map were correct, then he definitely wasn’t in the same universe as this one, as it contained no ores or even the components he had used to construct them. He hadn’t just been flung far into the past of his universe but instead into the past, future, or present of a different parallel universe. And his quantum clone theory wasn’t particularly far fetched. Fascinating. 

He might actually have been enjoying this if he had some decent companionship. Extremely specific, keenly missed, companionship. Ah. No such luck. 

There were life signals on the planet but most of them were organic and very far off. Shockwave could fly towards them but he quickly realized it would be a waste of fuel. Precious fuel, as there was no energon on this planet. Who knows, there might not be any in this entire universe. He could synthesize some from sunlight but he would need the correct components andwell...who knew if those existed in this dimension either. So many problems that required him to tease out a careful solution, and yet the only thing he wanted to do was talk to someone else.

It was silly, he laughed out loud at himself again. He had spent too long not knowing what he was missing and not enjoying what he had. He had been a part of many stimulating conversations over the intervening years and had taken pleasure in absolutely none of them. Shockwave could walk himself back through the memories of those talks and try to pretend to respond how he would have had he possessed his emotions but it wasn’t the same. He hadn’t responded that way and looking at those memories was painful and bitter. They were now all tinged with loss of course. Longing, regret, oh and far too much aching emptiness. And worryingly little regret. He had done great things after all. Great and terrible things. 

Damn Proteus and Sentinel to the pit. 

Although, it was pleasing to be reminded that both of the bots who grotesquely mutilated him were long dead, their grayed out frames turned to dust under the ruins of the senate buildings of Iacon.

He could’ve almost have kissed Megatron for killing each and every one of those selfish evil bastards. Ah. Earth made an impression on him too, whether he felt it or not. Humanity had some very satisfying swear words and turns of phrase. Fortunately senate was massacred, to his ultimate delight, but he...he had saved Alpha Trion. Shockwave gone to his apartment the night before the senate was meant to convene one final time and shot him so he couldn’t go. Sentiment apparently existed without emotion to spur it on...that had some curious implications he should examine. Soon, not now though. 

Now he needed to calculate his fuel consumption based on distance and current temperature. He could walk nonstop for two thousand kilometers and reach the organic life signatures on his grid in several days time. As long as he didn’t need to transform or fire his ion cannon he would have adequate energon once he arrived. He was more likely to run out of coolant before then but that could remedied as long as he could find a liquid of some sort. The two boiling red suns in the green sky would set, this planet wasn’t tidally locked, and the temperature would drop. He spun up the energy saving programs he had apparently constructed in himself after centuries in stasis and started putting one foot in front of the other. 

Walking for several days straight would give him plenty of time to think. Unfortunately. His current sense of self was like a reflection beneath a wall of ice. All that he had done, everything that he planned and constructed and set in motion, floated above him and reflected his own image. Purple, hulking, hideous. The two lives he’d lived layered over himself, separated by a clear, cold, partition yet pressed chest to chest breathlessly. He’d spent half his life as himself and the other half as his inversion. Still him, brilliant and sharp, but instead of shining with righteous fury, he glowed with an empty hollowed out purple arc light. Cold fusion in the deep vents below some dark bottomless sea. versus the molten plasma reactions of a star. He was still nuclear, just a flat shadow on the wall instead of the flickering flame that caused it. 

Shockwave wondered what he could have become if he had been able to smile all these years. Smiled and meant it. Would it have made a difference? He  _ had _ figured out how to solve their energy crisis after all. Disastrously. The ends did not justify the means in this case. Though he had done it, there was no undoing it. He had to integrate it into himself if he was going to be able to move forward, to function as something other than a relic trapped in the body of a destroyer. There was no forgiveness he could offer himself that would heal all the damage he had done, he’d have to earn it from those who mattered. But well...there was no on here with him. No one but the two sides of himself, back to back in the skittering, hissing red sand.

Again his surroundings answered with an unasked for favor. 

A light winked bright and boiling in the sky, a falling star. No. 

In a laser flash he sent out a probe, his terrain scans beeped back with a familiar set of specs. He was transforming before he could even think about it. His space cruiser alt-mode engaged the afterburners and he rocketed to the projected impact site of the bot who was plummeting through the atmosphere to the planet’s surface. His velocity was terminal, if he hit the sand at that speed he would be smashed to pieces. Even his reinforced armor would have twisted and crumpled up hard enough to pierce his spark chamber. Instant termination. 

Shockwave struck him in the side knocking him back up and away from the ground before transforming back into root mode and grabbing him around the waist. He curled around him and they hit the ground from only a kilometer up. Shockwave took most of the impact along his back and rolled them, his arms were still wrapped around him as they slid to a standstill in a heap. His weight was pressed down on top of him from chest to knees and he was hot, almost too hot to touch from the drag of the atmosphere. He felt good, heavy and solid and real. All too real. 

Still his spark was pulsing erratically at the feel of his spark so close to his. They hadn’t...he had asked, promised really, but they weren’t bonded. Maybe, if he was extremely fortunate that could be remedied, not that he deserved to be happy after everything he had done. 

Optimus Prime opened his optics and when he saw Shockwave was the one holding him he immediately jerked back and transformed his arm into an ion blaster. And really Shockwave couldn’t begrudge him that reaction. It was logical, it was probably an ingrained response at this point. It still stung. He could blame himself for how much that reaction hurt later. Now was the time to explain himself. 

He let go of him and put his hands flat on the ground at his sides. Having a face would have been really helpful in this situation, as he wanted to look up at him in obvious surrender. He hoped his dimmed yellow optic and limp posture conveyed that enough. 

“Shockwave.”

Oh his voice. He didn’t shudder but it was a near thing. His voice had no right to be so delightfully deep and resonant. It always used to do things to him, well it still did, now wasn’t the time to ask him for fun round of comm sex though. The things they used to get up. Ah. But they were both much younger, and sillier then. So much more daring and free with their sparks. They were here now though, together. He was semi-whole, he should...he needed to say something. Anything. “Did you keep your promise to me Optimus?”

Why did it open with that!? Too late and now he looked devastated. Optimus had transformed his blaster away now though. That was a start. He didn’t want to hurt him, he just had, he knew he had been hurting him every time he looked at him for the past 4 million years.

It must have been like watching someone you thought you knew well turn out to be a stranger in the crowd, over and over again. He couldn’t argue that he hadn’t been Shockwave for many millennia, he had been, that was the most galling part. He wasn’t himself or a stranger but something else. Some amalgamation of the two. All he had to do was ask Optimus to reconcile the two halves of himself when Shockwave was having trouble doing that himself. No small task. Yet he knew Optimus Prime was dubiously known for rising to any challenge and succeeding at seemingly impossible tasks.

He didn’t vent at all as Optimus’s optic’s softened above his battle mask. “I...yes. I tried to at least. You...didn’t give me much to hold onto, taking every opportunity to prove to me that you were never going to be as you once were and that I should accept that. But I never could convince myself fully that you weren’t still in there...somehow.”

Shockwave laughed brittlely at that. “Oh I’m sure I did. Yes. I wasn’t supposed to have emotions and yet I remember so much derision for myself at the sentiment I held for you. I was frustrated that it hadn’t been extinguished when Sentinel took my mind apart. He and his butchers managed to take the feeling out of me but not the memories of feeling. Sentiment. I think you might have noticed that a few times. I’m sorry if it gave you false hope.”

Optimus shook slightly above him before bracing his hands on either side of his head in the sand. “It wasn’t a false hope though. Here you are. I can tell it’s really you looking out at me from that yellow optic now.”

Shockwave ex-vented shallowly. “After 4 million years of me perpetrating genocidal chaos, medical torture, space colonialism, and all around moral bankruptcy I suppose our engagement’s officially off by now.”

Optimus let his head fall and it made a loud clank against the top of Shockwave’s optical housing. “You’re weren’t yourself. I know most of things you did you never would have done if you’d still been yourself. It all happened though. There’s no changing any of it. Now that we’re here in whatever dimension this is, both of us supposedly ‘dead’ in our home dimension, I don’t see any reason why we couldn’t pick up where we left off.”

Shockwave barked a laugh at that and his tone was bitter when he spoke. “Oh Optimus you’re far too good for me. I would have done at least half of those obscene, terrible, ugly things I did end up doing had I still had my emotional and personality cores. Because what I did with the ores? That solved our energy crisis, ensuring the future of our species. Sacrificing the good of the few for the good of the many. Isn’t that a tenant of Primus? Not that I’m particularly devout in the traditional sense. But seeing you here again like this, just as radiant and beautiful as you ever were. Wonderfully hot and heavy on top of me, would make even the most skeptic bot a believer in the divine.”

That got him a lovely reaction, Optimus’s face right over his optic actually blushed. They were so close he could feel the change in air flow as his cooling fans clicked on at their lowest setting.  


Oh how he longed for a mouth so he could smile with all his charm and desire up at this bot who had been his lover, his once future conjunx, the savior and leader of his people. He still enjoyed flirting with him just as much as he ever had it seemed. Shockwave didn’t think he could get under his panels right this second but the possibility of that happening soon did suddenly occur to him. Slag. His whole frame felt as hot as Optimus’s now and he hadn’t been the one just free falling through the atmosphere.

Optimus’s voice was lower and rougher than before and Shockwave wondered what he would have to do to get him to talk to him in that voice all the time. “I don’t believe you. I don’t think you’re giving yourself enough credit Shockwave. You’re right about one part though, you’re a self sacrificing fool. Hypocritical coming from me, the silly mech who’s here right now because he jumped into Unicron’s maw to save the Earth, but it’s still true. I’ve done terrible things, allowed atrocities to occur under my watch, maybe not the same as what you’ve done but neither Autobots nor Decepticons are innocent anymore. We haven’t been for a long time. The only thing to do now is decide what we’re going to do next.”

Shockwave laughed again though this it was genuine. “I’m going to have to yell at you for trying to offline yourself for the greater good another time because I care and the next time you try it you might not quantum clone yourself into another dimension. Right now though, right this second, I find myself wanting to kiss you. But that’s not going to happen with my current lack of lips so we might as well get up and start walking.”

Shockwave wasn’t going to tell him that his little intervention to save him from crashing to his death had cost him precious energon reserves and that he would probably drop into stasis lock before they reached the organic life signs on his HUD. Why ruin their reunion with petty details like his imminent death?

Optimus didn’t move to get up off of him though, instead he retracted his battlemask and leaned down to run his lips over Shockwave’s optic casing while murmuring. “You may not have lips right now but I do. I’ve wanted to do this for so long. I’ve missed you too Shockwave, more than I can tell you. In fact, I’d like to show you instead.”

_ Yessssss! _

Oh frag yes! He wasn’t going to need to imagine where he was going with those feather light kisses and small flicking licks. Big hands were running down his chest and sides, thick fingers exploring his vents and seams, ah, and finding sensitive cables and dips he didn’t even know were there. He hadn’t had anyone touch him like this in this frame during all those intervening years. No one had really touched him at all except to try and kill him or put him back together. Disappointing.  


But what he really needed was to just be in the moment experiencing this instead. No thoughts of what he’d missed out on or what he’d ultimately lost. The present was proving much more engaging and pleasurable.  


He ghosted his hand over his hip and Shockwave wasn’t going to be embarrassed about how he immediately retracted his array paneling. He wanted this so badly it didn’t matter. He was ready to let him do whatever he wanted to him, he was looking forward to it.  


Optimus chuckled as he slid his thumb and forefinger through his glistening purple protomesh folds, bumping his node lightly as Shockwave moaned. It was not nearly enough but he was so close already. He’d barely touched him him, but the weight of his body on top of his, his lips hot and wet mouthing against his neck was enough to drive his charge up to dizzying heights. 

His frame was making up for lost time. Denying yourself an overload for 4 million years was not ideal if you wanted to have any sort of stamina. He was going to be honest with him, when Optimus slipped a finger inside him and he winced.  


He was well lubricated, had been since before Optimus even got here, but he’d never had anything in this frame’s valve, not even his own fingers. Although the thought of using his gun arm for other purposes suddenly occurred to him, he would have to remember that for later when he got an eventual frame reformant. Well if he lived long enough to get one. Now wasn’t the time to worry about that though. Optimus didn’t need to see his facial expressions to understand that the tension in his frame was caused by pain. It was such a small sting, he’d experienced worse simply touching a new weld that was still hot.

But of course Optimus was Optimus. He withdrew his finger carefully so that it barely hurt at all, just a slight burn in the ring of his valve as he looked him in the optic. “Shockwave? Did I just hurt you?”

Shockwave ex-vented is a slow wave of frustration. “Not really, I’m just a bit tight. It’s the fact that I’m coming off a hmmm, long dry spell. I’ve never used this frame for interfacing before. A rather drastic departure from the games we used to play I know. You must miss being able to get your whole fist inside of me right now. Pit, I know I miss it.”

Optimus’s engine turned over with a loud cough and then he laughed. “I see. I will be gentle with you. Maybe if you’re, ah amenable, I can ride you instead? I would enjoy burying my face in between your legs as well but there is a lot of sand everywhere. Not that I’d let that stop me, it’s just the added...grit might be unpleasant for both of us.”

Shockwave returned his laugh because he couldn’t smile with all his teeth like he wanted to. “Optimus, I will gladly have you any way your are willing to let me, in any position or configuration you can imagine. And I know you can imagine some that will push both of us to the limits of our flexibility. Sand be damned, just frag my processor out. Please?”

Optimus smiled the smile he wished he could have as he kissed him lightly on the side of his head and reached down between them to take Shockwave’s neglected spike in his hand. “You don’t have to beg for that sweetspark, although I remember you doing so very winningly before.”

Shockwave gasped at the sensation of his big blue hand wrapped around the base of his spike.  


His voice was high and breathy as Optimus stroked him almost teasingly. “Oh you’re a wonderful tease, that’s what I remember. You used to send me internal video comms while I was on the senate floor, your lovely white thighs spread wide and your ah, fingers and sometimes that thick blue toy we loved, buried in your pretty little valve. Your disrespect for the government and protocol was almost as big a turn on as your voice was when you’d tell me how it felt. How you were imagining it was me stuffing you so full. And you wouldn’t stop until you’d overloaded me just from seeing you like that, untouched with my legs crossed pointedly in my senatorial seat. I’d have to spend the rest of the day trying not to leak out my panels before I got home and could make you frag me in the shower.”

Optimus shivered as he transformed his panels away. Yes! There was that gorgeous spike he’d just realized he had been missing. It was a little different than he remembered, though that made sense as it was likely he’d been through several dozen frame reformats since he had last seen his array.  


Shockwave couldn’t see his valve past his own spike and Optimus’s fist but he imagined it was also slightly different. He knew he was no longer talented with his mouth but there were still some things he could do with his helm buried between his legs. Static electricity play immediately came to mind. His gun hand vibrated quite nicely when he was charging it up, it also got quite warm. But now wasn’t the time for that as Optimus was taking both their spikes in his hand and pumping up and down tightly. Shockwave was trying to buck up into the motion helplessly as Optimus’s full weight was pushing down on his hips and thighs.

His voice was laced with static as he spoke. “Optimus I’m not, going, oh, to last if you keep that up. It’s been far too long for me. Tragic, I know.”

Optimus curled forward moving his hips back and down as he stroked their two spikes together faster. His voice that sultry bass. “I know. I intend to give you several overloads to make up for that, so go ahead and climax as many times as you can. I may no longer have the Matrix in my chest but the stamina it bestowed upon me hasn’t left me yet.”

Shockwave didn’t mean for his body to take it as a command but he shouted anyway as his vocalizer shorted out and he overloaded in a satisfying wave of sparked charge. His transfluid coated Optimus’s hand, decreasing the drag to a deliciously slick slide. He could definitely stand to do that again.  


Optimus seemed like he wanted to oblige him because he shifted forward, adjusted his hips, and then in one fluid motion sank slowly all the way down onto his spike. They both moaned in unison at the sensation. Primus he needed this.  


It would feel incredible to have him inside him, after they had time to prepare his valve, but this was delicious in a different way. Wet heat gripping him, pulling him in, Optimus savoring the feel of him. Rolling his hips in gentle circles, it was more than Shockwave could handle. Charge sparked up his array to his chest and he spat static and Optimus’s name over and over as he overloaded again. Slag, that was fast. Ugh. He wanted this to go on and on and on and on, but he wasn’t sure he had the energy reserves for this.  


Although offlining because he climaxed himself to death didn’t really sound like a bad way to go. Preferable to pretty much every other way he could think of. At least it wouldn’t hurt.  


Optimus just kept riding him gently, face soft and fond as he watched him shake underneath him. Shockwave could only dig his hands into the seams at his hips and thighs and hold on, he was entirely at his mercy like this. That thought alone would have probably done him in but he was trying to make this one last. So he used every scrap of resolve he had to stave off his overload.  


Shockwave’s vocalizer shorted out several times before he rebooted it and pleaded with him. “Take your pleasure a little bit faster and harder love. I want to see you overload at least once, it’s been too long.”

Optimus smiled at him winningly and curled his back in, changing the angle as he started to move over him at a quicker pace. Shockwave watched for a moment while his spike bobbed between them before he took it in his hand and pumped it. Optimus let out a stifled noise at that, and although he loved all the sounds he made he wanted to hear him scream. Pumping his spike in time to his thrusts was building up the heat between them rapidly but not fast enough. He needed Optimus to overload before he did. Then Shockwave remembered an old trick.  


His current form didn’t have a lot of the same wonderful things in his subspace, but each of his fingers could transform into a high energy transfer data cable, thin and flexible with a micro jack tip. Yes that should do nicely. With one hand he gripped the base of his spike hard and with the other one he allowed one of the cables to slither out, it shot down the slit in the head of Optimus’s spike and Shockwave kept unspooling it till it hit his transfluid reservoir. Optimus did howl then, his optics fritzing white as he overloaded hard.  


Shockwave withdrew the cable triumphantly and a thick spurt of transfluid coated his hands as Optimus rattled through his second rapid overload. Shockwave groaned as his valve was practically milking his spike at this point. It felt incredible and it should have definitely been enough to send him over again.  


Orion’s face...ah Optimus’s face was in rapture, looking down at him blissed out and happy. It was like a window, cracked and layered over an old holoprojection. He hadn’t seen him like this in 4 million years. He wanted to see him like this every second of every day until he ceased functioning.  


Shockwave’s engine let out at high whine as he used the last of his strength to roll them in the sand. They skidded down a small dune as he gripped Optimus’s hips hard, folding him almost in half as he drove into him over and over again. “Ori-ah-Optimus! I-ooohhhhhh-I love you, I am finally able to feel it again. Frag! Primus please, oh let me feel this forever, you-ah-don’t, you-I-slag. I want to kiss you so badly right now.”  


He was ex-venting so rapidly his fans were creaking audibly. Optimus made a pained noise deep in his vocalizer and reached up to pull Shockwave’s head towards him. He pressed his lips desperately to his glowing yellow optic and Shockwave overloaded with a shudder. It rolled through his lines and in its wake left a heavy sense of peace. Ah.  


He fell forward onto him with a loud thunk and vented in a loud hiss as Optimus pleasantly stroked his back and sides soothingly. He wasn’t sure if he could move. His systems were sending him all sorts of amusing warnings. But if he had to die this was probably the best death he could have ever hoped for.  


They didn’t move for a long time, Shockwave still buried deep inside him, their shared transfluid leaking out of him to drip with a wet hiss into the sand below them.  


When Optimus finally stopped petting him he angled his head to the side to see Shockwave’s optic as he spoke. “You know I enjoy having you inside me while we recharge but I’m starting to finally come down and I’ve noticed the...persistent sand-y-ness of this entire...situation.”

Shockwave chuckled and it sounded weak to even his audials. Optimus’s look went from amused to concerned in an instant and Shockwave knew without a shadow of a doubt he was about to ruin the mood.  


He tried to move up off of him and realized he could only retract his spike slowly. Not good. His HUD let him know he had 3% of his emergency fuel reserves left. Slag. He’d blown through the emergency backup already. Well. No use in hiding it now. Even if he did nothing except vent while Optimus carried him towards the faint blips of civilization on their life scans he’d still offline by the time they got there several days later. He instantly felt the ghost of memories of being too choked up to speak. This was the same, except he no longer had an oral intake to gag around.

Why was everything always so needlessly painful for him? Him and Optimus. Oh this was going to be miserable, he almost wished for a brief second he couldn’t feel anything again. But no, if he was going to go out now it was going to be feeling supremely sexually satisfied and surrounded by Optimus’s arms.

Shockwave’s vocalizer wavered as he spoke quietly. “I may have...ah used a little too much energy stopping your deadly descent into this planet’s surface. By the time we had our spikes out I knew I wouldn’t be able to make the walk towards life signs on my scans. I’m at 3% of my emergency backup charge. Even if you insist on carrying me, or transforming and dragging me there I’ll run out of energon entirely and drop into stasis lock a day before we reach them. It might be nicer to just...stay here with me until I drift off. Would you be willing to?”

Optimus was looking at him aghast in horror right now. He could see all sorts of emotions flick over his features before he settled on despair. “Shockwave...I’m not just going to sit here and wait for you to die in my arms! I’ll transform and drive full speed for the planetary life signs, if they’re sufficiently advanced I can get a bridge back here instantly. I’m not going to let you...not again, never again.”

He always did have such an indomitable will. Once he decided something it was almost impossible to sway him from that course of action. Shockwave didn’t want to hurt him, but he was realistic. It was something he’d always been even before the empurata and shadowplay.  


His voice was gentle as he murmured. “Then you’ll probably run out of fuel yourself before you reach them. This whole plan of yours is relying on the fact that they’re advanced. I’ve been on this planet longer than you have and I have yet to see any signs of technology of any sort. I knew I was at a fuel deficit when I landed here, that I would be cutting it close if I walked all the way there. Then you showed up and I decided saving your life was worth using the last of my energy reserves. And yes, using my reserve energy to interface you into the sand was probably needlessly suicidal, but I don’t regret a second of it. I love you and I got to show you one last time.”

Optimus made a high creaking groan before he stood up and folded Shockwave into his arms, almost like he weighed nothing. Which was ridiculous as they were roughly the same height and Shockwave outweighed him by four tons.  


Optimus was holding him fiercely, cradling him to his chest protectively. “No. This isn’t the end. The Allspark wouldn’t take me after I died to end Unicron. It dropped me here in this alternate dimension, the same one where the singularity dropped you several years before it deposited me. What was years of thinking you dead for me was seemingly hours alone for you. And yet here we are together, mostly ourselves again, for the first time in 4 million years. I’m...happy and I love you. I’m not particularly religious for a former Prime but even I can take a hint. We’ll make it to those life signs, they’ll be sentient and have the materials needed to synthesize energon, and you won’t go offline before we get there because I’ll drive as fast as I can with you in my trailer.”

Shockwave wanted to believe him. It was always so easy for him to believe him.  


As if summoned by Optimus’s words of hope a sonic boom rocketed through the planet’s atmosphere and a very recognizable spaceship warp jumped into high atmosphere orbit. It was close enough for them to make out individual windows on the side of the hull. Shockwave started laughing, it was deep and rich and it felt amazing.  


He only laughed harder when Optimus rumbled in disbelief. “That...that can’t be the  _ Lost Light _ ...it’s the  _ Lost Light _ isn’t it?”

If any ship was going to suddenly pop into existence overhead it was that one. Oh this was going to be, well it was going to be an adventure. He wondered what Rodimus would make of Optimus showing up with him in his arms. This was going to be hilarious. Shockwave coughed as his laughter cut off abruptly. Ah. His systems were already rerouting power away from his vocalizer. He switched to internal shortwave comms.  


::Hail them. I’m sure Rodimus’s reaction alone will be worth the trouble of making them land for us. Forgive me if I drift off, I want to be here to see it believe me::

Optimus’s hands wrapped around his shoulder and knees harder as he looked up. “Not just Rodimus. If it’s a quantum copy of the  _ Lost Light _ from my section of the timeline then Megatron is there as his co-captain.”

Shockwave wanted to gasp, mockingly. Instead he settled for derisive internal comms :Optimus you  _ didn’t _ . Oh you giant softspark. This is going to be even wilder than I originally surmised::

Optimus snorted, he must have comm’d the ship because it was already moving slowly down towards them through the atmosphere. “I was...I was hoping that being a part of something greater than himself, for the greater good, might be what he needed to make peace with everything. To my shame I secretly hoped that he and the crew would never find the Knights of Cybertron and never come back. It looks like at least some of that hope came true.”

Shockwave, since he was going to live now, was going to have to thoroughly pick the brain of every scientist on board that vessel. The quantum anomalies alone would keep him entertained for several years at any rate. Maybe longer as he intended on fragging Optimus all over the ship, in every position they could manage, and that was going to take up a lot of his time. Shockwave couldn’t complain though. It was a better conclusion to his story than any he’d been able to grasp before now.  


Shockwave wished he could smirk. ::I can’t wait to see the ol’ slagmaker’s face when he catches us fragging in the captain’s chair for the first time::  


Optimus tried to sound stern but he was smiling down brilliantly at him. “Shockwave! That’s highly inappropriate. No one is ever going to catch us fragging in the captain’s chair, as we’ll do it while covering a whole shift and letting everyone else leave early. They'll be so relieved that they won't notice or care what we get up to while they're off duty.”

Yes, this was definitely going to be an adventure. For the first time in 4 million years he was giddy and actually looking forward to his unknown future. Because he knew it would most likely contain Optimus, and lots and lots of passionate facing. Oh and mind-bendingly complicated, bleeding edge scientific experimentation. What more could he really ask for?

Shockwave was hanging onto consciousness by a thin cable of pure will as the ship got close enough that they felt the wind displacement from its descent stir up the sand around them in a great whooshing cloud.  


::I know I said the engagement was probably over but how do you feel about me proposing again and making it official? That way if we do get caught Ultra Magnus will feel uniquely bad while ticketing us for public indecency, what with us being two happily married conjunx and all::

Optimus leaned down and kissed his optical casing swiftly as the  _ Lost Light _ put down a docking ramp towards them. “Ah now you’ve gone and ruined the surprise. I wanted to be the one to propose this time. Oh well, maybe we can take turns, we seem to be pretty good at doing that in other areas.”

Shockwave wanted to chuckle at that but instead he just ex-vented contentedly and tilted his head up slightly for another kiss from Optimus to his helm. He could really get used to this living thing if it was always going to be good like this. 

  
He was slightly disappointed he didn’t get to see Megatron’s original reaction to finding them here in this alternate dimension, Shockwave in Optimus’s arms, while he kissed his head tenderly, on account of him blacking out as they ascended the loading ramp. But Optimus described it in sufficient detail for him later after he woke up in their shared berth on the  _ Lost Light _ . The first day of their new life together started with a whole lot of laughter and love making. It was magnificent. 

**Author's Note:**

> This is a companion fic for No Cybertron for Old Men because I couldn't resist giving OP and Shockwave at least a little bit of a happy ending as they are both "dead" in my AU's cannon. Also I was complaining about there not being much sounding in fics and so this one has a little bit of that. ;) I would die for horny Senator Shockwave alright. This fic was amazing to write because of that. Also remember I don't write anything hurtful I can't fix with love and affection so like even the depressing hellpit that is ShockOP is safe for you to read when you're reading my stuff. <3


End file.
